Now... I don't usually talk about politics, but I do like Obama... not always necessarily because of his political actions, but because he is the first Black, Geek President that actually seems plugged into whats going on in America.
So here's whats got my blood pressure up.A woman calls the police because she sees a black man breaking into someones house. The police show up very quickly because it is a rich white neighborhood. They arrested Professor Henry "Skip" Gates, director of the W.E.B. Du Bois Institute of African American Studies... even though he was breaking into his OWN HOME... even AFTER he produced his Drivers licence and his Harvard ID card.
But in the police officers defense, Gates' fingerprints were everywhere.
Gates was angry that he was looked upon as a criminal, so... like a normal, proud black man, he started talking shit to the pigs. He shot them the standard "You have no idea who your messin' with!"
The cops, being normal white guys with a badge and a gun on their side and the back-up of the largest gang the United States has ever seen (the Police Department)... resort to calling him names.
Jungle-Monkey, I believe was the term used. (Not what I would have gone with.)
"Oops, my bad, boy" says the cops.
"No problem, honkey." says Professor Gates.
Problem solved... or not.
Now, Obama... the President of the United States of America, says the Cops "Reacted stupidly".
Professor Gates is actually a close friend of Barack Obama, so of coarse he is going to side with him. Whenever the man comes down hard on one of my friends, I always side with my friend as well... so, no big surprise there.
Obama apologised and said he "would like to invite both men over to the White House for a beer".
Now... to me that is cool as shit, I don't care who you are.
Here is a regular guy saying "look... some shit was said, mistakes were made, it ain't nothing that cant be worked out over a beer at my house."
No big Whoop.
Okay, here is where I get pissed off.
The fucking Media has turned this into a huge radical event that they are calling the "Beer Summit". But they aren't focusing on the fact that the President is trying to get people to put aside their differences and bring them together in a normal, manly way... to have a couple of beers and talk about some shit. No... All the Media is concerned about is WHAT BRAND OF BEER will be served at the meeting.
The fucktard media saying that Obama has been seen in an "unpatriotic light" before because he has been seen drinking BUDWEISER beer out of a can.
Budweiser beer is generally looked upon as a normal American, every-man's beer. But the media has drudged up the fact that Budweiser has sold their business to a DUTCH Company and is therefore no longer American Owned even though it is brewed and produced right here in the good ol' U.S. of A. by American workers.
WHO REALLY GIVES A FLYING FUCK!?
Barack Obama, whether you like him or not, is the H.N.I.C. of the U.S.A., and IF he invites you over for a beer to hang out and talk about some shit... you say... "YES". I don't give a fuck if he hands you a tallboy can of Schlitz Malt Liquor, you take it and you drink it and if he wants to play Nintendo Wii bowling you accept his challenge and you Whip his Ass... and you talk shit while you are doing it... because that's what GUYS DO.
If your friend invites you over to play video games and while your there he says "You want a beer?"... you say "Hell yea!"... you don't ASK what fucking brand it is. Its FREE BEER!
That's as AMERICAN as it Gets, motherfuckers!
People are lucky that the President is such a normal guy.
If I were the First Black/Geek president I would also have invited the guys over for a beer, but I would have had a small group of my friends over and and when I asked "What kind of beer do you guys want?"... ALL of my buddies would have piped up with "Bull!"
At which point I would have had a huge Bull smash through the wall of the Oval Office, the lights would have went dim and a disco ball and several brass poles would have descended from the ceiling. Then Topless strippers holding silver trays with cans of Schlitz would have come spinning down to serve them as the song "Straight up N.I.G.G.E.R." by Ice-T would have started blaring from the speakers that would have hydraulicked out of the walls.
At this point I would have turned around and said "I'm the first black President bitches... I do shit in STYLE!" then I would have raised my glass, making everyone else raise theirs and I would have said...
"Guys like you DO grow on trees..."
"Here's to you. . . Sucking my Dick."
(Your lucky... that's all I'm saying.)
So THEN... the woman that originally called 911 gets her little feelings hurt, hires a LAWYER and has that lawyer make an official media statement that she is upset, that she is the Only One who did the Right Thing and that she wasn't invited to the White House... and in conclusion to her statement she has her lawyer say that... "She doesn't like beer anyway."
She should have added a nice long "NNnYyaaaaaa!" on the end of that statement and stuck out her fucking tongue like the little Bitch that she is.
Quit yer whining bitch, this is a Man thing... you wouldn't understand.
We're not serving tea.
We're not using coasters.
And were not watching Oprah... (even though she IS also a close personal friend of Gates and Obama.)
Since when did this country turn into a big bunch of crybaby Pussies?
Other countries look at us like we are the Helmet-wearing Retards on the block.
We run around, fighting amongst ourselves over stupid shit... and we are WAY too Powerful while we're doing it.
Things to learn from this.
1. Even super intelligent Harvard professors forget their keys and resort to "Yo Mama" when accosted by the cops.
2. Even highly educated white police officers who teach other police officers about the negative effects of racial profiling... hate Black people.
3. Women will bitch about ANYTHING.
4. The isn't much that cant be solved over a cold beer.
UPDATE TO THIS STORY:
The Beer Summit happened and I'm sorry to say that the President and the other two dumbasses all pussied out and drank THEIR OWN BRAND OF BEERS!
Come the fuck on...
And to make matters worse... The Professor drank Red Stripe, I suppose to go along with his Love of all things Jamaican. (what-the-fuck-ever)... but then he switched to Sam Adams Light because Red Stripe was way too strong. (gay)
The Cop drank Blue Moon. (gayer than gay)
And Obama drank Bud light.
Come on...
And what the fuck is with the white patio furniture and the silver tray? What is this? A fucking tea party?
Be a fucking man.